Shotgun Learns to Forgive…

My mom tried to convince me to go to church the other day and once again, I had to turn her down.

I’ve seen what kind of man the modern church produces.  I know him well.  Whatever monster I might turn into for lack of fellowship and partaking of Holy Communion, it can’t be worse than the modern Christian man.  One in particular sparked this writing.  There are many out there like him.

Unlike the magic word that riles up the negros to no end, I believe there are two real insults that a man must react against if he is to be a Christian and a man.

We cannot be cowards and we cannot be liars.

Even criminals in the old white movies wouldn’t stand to be cowards and a few were even proud of their own honesty (“honor” among thieves).

The person I have in mind (who is typical of many Christian males today) is both a coward and a liar.  That is the worst possible thing I can say about a man — it’s the worst possible two things a man can be.  And Christendom churns out men of this quality by the thousands.

In our online discussions, this man likes bullying women around with his theology.

When a Christian man comes to the women’s defense, our scoundrel arranges matters so that the Christian can no longer see his words or read his writing, but the women still can.  He hides, like a coward.

His zealousness for a conceptual scheme lies behind his capacity for evil.  In his slobbering disposition, he’ll say and do anything to justify the commands of his neo-Gnostic god (who is nothing more than a syllogism).

How much evil has been committed in the name of a syllogism?

I dealt with this “man” tonight, for the first time in many months.  He hasn’t changed of course, but I have.  For some reason, my anger at his cowardice gave way to something very much like pity. I always think it sounds condescending to claim that you pity your opponent, but I honestly feel a genuine sense of pity.  I have no intention to be patronizing or haughty towards my enemy in admitting it.

Wasn’t it by grace that God provided me with a father who read from Lewis and Tolkien and who guided me through the forests of old Europe?  Wasn’t it by simple grace that I rejected my government school indoctrination?  Was my hand guided along the bookshelves until it stopped on James Harriot’s “All Creatures Great and Small” and did the Holy Spirit compel me to read it, even though it didn’t have a flashy cover or short, action-packed chapters?  Was it God who allowed me to fall in love with the people there, and a place that only exists now in stories?  Was it He who lead me to blogs like Spirit / Water / Blood, and Cambria Will not Yield?

Yes, I think it was.

It really is miraculous when you stop and think about it.  How many billions of dollars have been spent, not just in government education, but in pop-culture, federal law and beyond, to ensure that I never knew blogs like “Cambria Will Not Yield” existed — to ensure that I would never think of myself as anything other than a member of the de-racinated, propositional gang of American comrades?

The pressure on me to conform was overbearing and yet, here I am, blogging away about taboo themes that are so insulting I could never bring them up at a family reunion or in any church.

Can I not forgive our scoundrel for giving in to this tremendous pressure?

I can, and do, blame Christian men for their cowardice and their lying tongues.  I hate the dogmatism that gives them license to sin like this…

…but I think I’ve matured enough to forgive them for it.

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12 Responses to Shotgun Learns to Forgive…

  1. Faust says:

    I am so thankful that I escaped the grip of the evil lies that strangle and destroy those around us. But forgiving those perfidious fools who sat by and let it happen is hard. Grace lead us out of evil and heals our souls, thank goodness. One hope it will do the same for others.

  2. Maggie Nolia says:

    Sorry for this OT comment, but… do you have some more movie recommendations? We very much enjoyed Despereaux and Second-Hand Lions!

  3. Josh says:

    Maggie, do you know if The Tale of Despereaux is kid friendly? I just put it in my Netflix queue, but the wife and I like to screen them first unless a like-minded person like you can weigh in.

    • Maggie Nolia says:

      Josh, I would preview it if I were you, because all families have at least slightly different rules or issues they deal with in particular. For example, the creepiness of the head rat, the macabre implications of cannibalism by the rats, etc., may be too disturbing to some children or very young children, whereas it might just be part of the adventure for others.

      • shotgunwildatheart says:

        It’s been a very long time since I’ve been around children or in a restrained family-environment, and I didn’t realize it, but I may have become desensitized to the filthy culture we’re all forced to live in.

        So, I appreciate your comments about the movies, Maggie (and Josh).

        But, I’m putting together another short list despite my blind-spot. To be honest though, it’s very hard to find worthwhile material in anything produced after 1950. Anything good about pop-culture is good accidentally, it seems.

  4. rjp says:

    I always think it sounds condescending to claim that you pity your opponent, but I honestly feel a genuine sense of pity.

    You should feel no pity for an enemy. The sword they carry is just as powerful as the one you hold, maybe even more so in this age.

    • shotgunwildatheart says:

      I don’t know what you mean by “sword”, but when I think of my sword, I think of the sword of the Spirit, which is mighty for the tearing down of strongholds.

      …and that’s something no pagan can outmatch.

  5. Josh says:

    Thanks, Maggie. We’ll give it a look over.

  6. Marcus says:

    It sounds to me like a knowledgable Christian man was teaching and rebuking his sisters in Christ and you came along trying to be a hero. What truth did you “defend” these helpless damsels from? Did you at least get a kiss for all your bootlicking?

  7. shotgunwildatheart says:

    I’ll answer that question in person with you, if you’re that interested.

  8. Marcus says:

    Sure, I’m on my way over. Reading your entry above though it seems you prefer to do your “dealing with” online. You even turned down an opportunity to face these people in person when invited by your own mom!

  9. shotgunwildatheart says:

    I would prefer a real life confrontation, Marcus, where implications that good Christian ladies give out promiscuous kisses wouldn’t be carelessly interjected.

    You’ve confused my unwillingness to attend church on a full-time basis with cowardice in confronting ideological opponents (though I think you made this connection maliciously instead of in a spirit of good-will and honesty).

    Since the “man” I was referring to in my blog was too much of a coward to have an honest and open discussion with me, maybe you’d like to take his place and publicly stand for the contemporary egalitarian religion folks are calling “Christianity”?

    I’ve been on my front-porch waiting for well over an hour. Did you get lost? Or were you lost on the highway of sarcasm?

    In either case, I look forward to our meeting — I hope you’re ready.


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