Category Archives: Best of Shotgun

Traveling Knight

“Still the knight is young  and traveling on with pleasure. Grant him wishes well, luck in the fullest measure. Bid you all adieu, stories to keep and treasure. When he’s passing through, ever and on he goes…” I tweaked those … Continue reading

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Shotgun and the Leprechaun

If you’re wondering what happened to my response to Ehud’s F&H slam article, I’ve unpublished it. I decided to take the high road; be the bigger man, as it were. So come, my minions. Critique me; psychoanalyze me; make judgements … Continue reading

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Luck of the Irate

Here’s a pro tip guys: if you give a girl flowers and she’s disappointed because they’re not edible or otherwise useful around the farm, marry her. Here’s another pro tip: no matter how angry you get at God, never challenge … Continue reading

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The Braggart

Men who brag about wanting to meet Jesus have something seriously wrong with them. You all don’t have to share this opinion. Our judgements of others are influenced by life’s little anecdotes as well as individual temperaments, so I don’t … Continue reading

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Shotgun vs. Hipstergrass

Modern bluegrass needs its own category: “Hipstergrass.” The Dixie Chicks and Nickel Creek, back in the 90’s, started the slide, and now every two-bit suspender-wearing degenerate is strumming a banjo, claiming to sing old time music, and wearing the thickest … Continue reading

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A Rose From the Ruins

“What would you do, Captain Quantrill, were yours the power and the opportunity?” inquired the secretary. “Do, Mr. Secretary? I would wage such a war as to make surrender forever impossible. I would break up foreign enlistments by indiscriminate massacre. … Continue reading

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(12) Chivalry vs. The Mexican Mafia

(An anecdote from my time in the prison. As I’m no longer employed there, I thought I’d re-post it): Some of you know I’ve taken a job as a prison guard. The rules say I’m not supposed to talk about … Continue reading

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How to Save a Life

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend, Somewhere along in bitterness, and, I’d have stayed up with you all night, Had I known how to save a life… I got to Paddy’s before Heimbach (aka: The Little Fuhrer) showed up, … Continue reading

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Edwards’ Journey is Our Journey

I was having a bad day by all accounts. North Carolina extorts money from me periodically in the form of speeding fines so I drove three hours to a court house in the middle of nowhere to pay up.  While … Continue reading

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The Poet as Swordsman

“We are three to three,” said the lesser Highlander, glancing his eyes at our party: “if ye be pretty men, draw!” and unsheathing his broadsword, he advanced on me. I put myself in a posture of defence, and aware of … Continue reading

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